An Eternity of Love
by BornToWriteRight
Summary: Jack and Rose learn that there's nothing stronger than love, no matter what obstacles lie in their path. Please R&R!
1. The Fatal Beginning

The wind breezed past, carrying the ocean mist into the contented faces of Jack and Rose. Rose held her arms out straight at her sides.

"I'm flying!" she cried in happiness, Jack close behind her.

Jack nodded. "This is such a Kodak moment."

"What's a Kodak moment?" asked Rose.

"I-...I don't know," admitted Jack, still hypnotized by the rushing waters of the ocean.

The boat lurched. With a short shriek, Rose regained her balance after nearly falling, Jack holding onto her waist. She released her breath in relief, then smiled softly.

All of the sudden, Jack's arms flew off Rose and began swinging wildly in the air. Rose gasped as she grabbed hastily onto the boat railing in order to maintain her balance. She then screamed as Jack began to run around in a figure-eight-like movement on the deck, his arms still swinging above his head. A look of horror was on his face, watching his untamed arms and wild legs fly around like they had minds of their own.

After a brief minute, his arms fell to his sides, and his legs stopped from under him, sending him soaring and landing two yards away from where he had tripped on the bench. His face was scrunched up flat against the wooden planks. Then, he flipped over onto his back in one swift movement, like a pancake on a skillet.

"I'm okay," he breathed, his breath unsteady. He limped over to the tip of the boat, where Rose stood, dumbstruck.

After a few moments of steadying their beating hearts, they stood together, staring out into the vast ocean. Rose closed her eyes, taking in the moment.

A jolt hit Jack's chest. Without warning, he gave Rose's back a hard push, sending her down into the boat's path. He screamed, his fingers fumbling to grab her hand.

"It's okay, I've--" His normal voice deepened and twisted into the noise of some sort of farm animal as he held onto Rose's hand. Rose moaned in fright as she held onto Jack's wrist.

Jack coughed, surprising himself with the tone of his voice. "Grab onto that little handle down there. My hands are getting sweaty."

Rose nodded fearfully, but clutched onto the steel handle on the tip of the ship, her legs dangling towards the water.

"Please, Jack, hurry!" she screamed, ignoring the fact that she could have sworn he'd pushed her in the first place.

"I'll get a rope!" announced Jack as he frantically searched for one with his eyes on one of the dock benches. There! As soon as he began to run, another jolt hit him, making him stop in his tracks. His hands picked themselves up again, unlatching his suspenders and pulling down his pants. He tried his best to pull his hands away, but it was no use. Wet manure slithered from between his buttcheeks, falling in heaps onto Rose's rounded face. She screamed at the top of her lungs, causing the last of the diarrhea to fall into her open mouth. She gargled and spat. Tears fell from her eyes and onto her chunky brown cheeks.

"Rose," Jack began, his voice cracked in between heavy sighs, "I am SO sorry...I can't stop...something's controlling me..."

Rose just continued to scream. In an instant, she stopped, looking up in horror. Suspenseful music began to play out of no where as a giant mound of freshly-made manure came whirling down straight toward her face.

"No-o-o-o-o...!"

In slow motion, the swab hit her small body, causing her to lose her grip on the metal and go whirling into the ocean. She disappeared into the waves, only shades of brown liquid surrounding where she'd fallen.

Jack yelled out in horror, his whole world falling apart.

Joe the Donkey gazed curiously at the strange-looking voodoo doll that lay lifeless in his hay. What was this strange object? Building up much courage, he grasped his yellowed teeth around its foot, the doll's arms flailing and waving as Jackie shook it. Outside of the livestock quarters, he heard a surprised scream from a human. Probably a woman. Looking out his small metal-barred window, he caught a glimse of a blonde-haired man running around the deck. Joe dropped the doll and stared down at it. It was in the same position as the human man.

To Be Continued...


	2. The Safety Attempts

Rose twirled frantically in the icy depths, fighting for any air at all. Waves of liquidized poop formed a blob around her legs like a deteriotating hula skirt. She screamed stupidly, admitting salty water into her lungs and putting little crosses in her eyes like she was going to suffocate or something crazy like that.

Then, for some reason, mischievous music started playing to replace the dramatic music that had been playing for the last ten minutes, making her feel slightly relieved. She remembered that one Desperate Housewives episode where that one girl found the stashed money in the cabinet, and that bouncy-mischievous-mysterious music started to play. It was the same tune that was playing right now.

What could happen NOW that could fit that mood?

"Oopsy daisy," DJ Gangsta Jamz said on his loudspeaker all of the sudden. "'Mischief Mix' is right next to 'Dying Damsel Dilemma Music'. My bad."

"No problem," Rose replied from the water, allowing more water down her throat as the exes in her eyes became clearer. Dramatic music started to play again.

Suddenly, a huge whoosh of bubbles sprang into the water, and Jack and Joe the Donkey were right in front of Rose, with air tanks and all! Joe had a delightful wetsuit on, as did Jack, and they both had air pumps like professional divers.

Jack giggled femininely. "Rose, great news! Joseph explained the whole situation, and we made up, and then he proposed! I'm the happiest ladyman in the world!"

Rose was gasping for breath.

"Rosie, dear? What's wrong? Is something troubling you?" Jack observed her pale white, lifeless face for a moment, shrugging. Then, he remembered. "Oh, right! Sorry. You must be dying. That's why I found these convenient jars full of air for you to breathe!"

Rose grinned, knowing she was saved, and eagerly reached for them. Jack popped open the lid as water flooded in and the oxygen escaped in tiny bubbles. "Well, I know you prob'ly think I pushed you, but really--" Rose screamed what was left in her watery lungs.

Joe and Jack kissed outside of their oxygen mouthpieces, whispering gaily. "Oh, Joey, you're such a charmer!"

Rose tried to get their attention due to her dying state, ignoring the fact that her former lover was now gay and in love with a donkey.

Joe put his mouth to Jack's ear. Jack's eyes widened in pleasure. "Oh, Joe, do you think we're ready? Well, okay..." They swam to the ocean floor into a large coral cave, giggling mischievously.

Rose was left suffocating in her little brown bubble of hopelessness. All of the sudden, the dreamiest lifeguard came to her rescue!

"I'm David Hasselhoff, and I was born roughly sixty-two years from now!" he announced hunkily. Rose cried in delight, but then was horrified to see that he was referring to the other drowning rich girl a few yards away.

Then, a strange little object came floating down and bonked her on the head. It was a rectangle with little buttons with numbers on them and a screen that said "28 MISSED CALL(S)". Rose felt a little burst of hope from inside of her. She punched in her lucky numbers: 9 and 11. There was a weird noise at the end. Then an actual voice came!

"We're sorry, but our phoneline has not been invented yet. Please wait approximately fifty-seven years, and we will be at your service."

All Rose could do was cry.


End file.
